GH Humor 1: It's the Kiss Cam
by larajla
Summary: Yasu decides to create his own "Kiss Cam" when two amorous spirits affect the SPR team. No one is safe. NOTE: I apologize for the lateness of posting for this challenge.


Mai checked her email before starting her homework. She deleted a few pieces of junk mail before she saw one from Yasu. He had been acting odd at the office earlier. When she asked, he said she'd find out later. 

Taking a sip of tea, she opened the email to find an invitation. 

_You are cordially invited to attend a special viewing of the last SPR case, especially edited to highlight the friendly attitude the team has with each other._

Mai paused her reading, feeling her cheeks heat up. The ghosts were a couple who wanted to be together. They had inhabited every one of the team at least once during the investigation before being convinced to pass on. She took another sip of tea. Yasu was showing his movie at the SPR office the following afternoon. 

Mai's thoughts replayed her own experience being possessed briefly only to find herself wrapped in Naru's arms. They had pulled apart slightly when the spirits left them. Naru had looked at her, then kissed her again. That's how Yasu found them. She knew it would be on his so-called viewing. Groaning, Mai closed her laptop and pulled out her homework.

\- x X x - 

Mai was waiting for the teapot when she heard Yasu come in. He was whistling. She shuddered. Last time he was this happy, he had gone beyond flirting with Monk. He'd actually sat on the older man's lap and kissed him. Monk had left the office quickly and they hadn't seen him for a week. 

Mai glanced at Yasu as she walked through the kitchen door. He had set a screen up and arranged the furniture so it was all facing it. Mai knocked on Lin's door and hurried in at his acknowledgment. She placed his cup of tea next to his laptop. 

"Yasu's whistling," Mai said softly. Lin paused typing and looked up at her. 

"Is that all?" 

"He's rearranging the entire lobby. I have a bad feeling," Mai said. She left quickly with Naru's tea as Lin took a large swallow of tea before typing again. 

Mai skirted the couch which was within touching distance of the wall. Yasu wasn't in the lobby anymore, but she could hear him in the kitchen. She didn't bother knocking on the door. She hurried to Naru's side, placing the teacup so it didn't disturb his paperwork. 

"I take it from your sneaking and the whistling that Yasu's here being a nuisance." Naru didn't look up from his paperwork. 

"I don't want to go back out there." 

"Mai, you're the safest of everyone here. For some reason, he's more interested in harassing the males of SPR." 

"But we . . . we . . ." 

"Kissed?" Naru looked up to see his assistant bright red. She nodded violently. "If that's all that he's showing, there's nothing to worry about." 

"That's all? I know he took a video of us." 

"I assure you there was a lot more going on than kissing." 

"What do you mean?" Mai asked. She had seen the team hugging and kissing when they were possessed. Ayako's charms hadn't slowed the ghosts in the least. 

"There's a reason I slept with you the last night." Naru turned back to his paperwork, leaving Mai confused. "Now, get back to work." 

"I thought you wanted to." Naru didn't reply to the sad, softly spoken words as Mai left the room. He'd have to explain to her later. Right now, he had to get as much done as possible before chaos took over his office.

\- x X x - 

Mai sat at her desk and continued filling out the paperwork Naru had given her. As she sipped her tea, she smelled popcorn. Yasu started whistling again and she contemplated running for her apartment. The door rang as it was opened. Mai looked up to see Monk holding the door for Ayako. They paused at Mai's desk. 

"Mai-chan, how long has Yasu been whistling?" Monk asked. 

"Since he got here." 

"We can go out for lunch," Ayako suggested. 

"It would be worse if we tried to avoid him," Mai shook her head. The kitchen door swung open with Yasu carrying bowls. 

"Bou-san, Ayako . . . I'm glad you could make it." Yasu dropped the bowls on Mai's desk, spilling some of the popcorn on the paperwork. Mai picked up the popcorn and threw it back into the bowls. "Let me show you to your seats?" Yasu directed them to the couch. As they sat, he handed Ayako a bowl. She passed it to Monk who looked like he was expecting something to pop out of the bowl. He poked at it before putting it on the chair in front of him. 

The door rang again as Madoka walked in. She paused, looking around the room. She controlled the smile that wanted to come out. Yasu had sent her some clips and asked her opinion on some of the racier videos he'd caught. She wondered which of the guys would be the most embarrassed. She slipped by Mai's desk and let herself into Lin's office. The door rang again as Masako and John came in. 

"My Mai, can you get big boss?" Yasu asked as he directed the latest arrivals to the seats he'd planned for them. Mai nodded as she got up from her desk. She knocked on Naru's door and entered when he called. She moved in and closed the door behind her, not moving further into the room. 

"I take it everyone is here." 

"Yes." Naru nodded, neatly stacking his paperwork. "Well, I guess I'll go join the others." Mai reached for the door handle and Naru's hand covered hers. Mai blushed and looked up. Naru's face was near hers. Her face flushed darker. 

"Mai, tea," Naru said, smirking. Mai glared at him and pulled her hand away. Naru opened the door and watched her storm to the kitchen, muttering as she went. It didn't take long until she had tea for everyone and handed it out. Lin and Madoka were squeezed with Monk and Ayako on the large couch. John and Masako were on the smaller couch. Naru and Yasu sat in the two additional chairs. Mai moved to her desk for the teacup she left for herself only to have Yasu wrap his arms around her. 

"You can't sit at your desk. You have to join us." 

"All the seats are taken." 

"I'm sure we can squeeze you in. I know." Yasu pushed her at Naru. Mai stumbled and landed on her boss' lap. Naru wrapped his arms around her waist as Mai struggled to get up. 

"Just sit still, Mai. I'd like to get this over as soon as possible." Mai stopped struggling. 

"I'd like to thank everyone coming to today's showing. After much thought, I decided to call our movie today "Kiss Cam" in honor of all the passionate encounters from our last case." Yasu was greeted with groans. He turned off the lights and started the showing.

\- x X x - 

The large screen was black with large white letters. **Kiss Cam #1: Monk and Ayako**. It faded, showing Ayako and Monk arguing. Ayako started swinging her purse at his head and stopped. Looking at her hand confused, she dropped it. Her hands reached out and grabbed the collar of his shirt. She pulled him toward her and kissed him. Hard. Monk looked shocked before grabbing her and kissing her back. 

Mai gasped, feeling very uncomfortable. It felt like she was watching her parents kiss. Naru shook his head as she tried to look around him at the two on the couch. They were looking anywhere but at each other. Yasu and Madoka were grinning. 

"Madoka helped Yasu," Mai whispered in Naru's ear. He looked at her, letting her know he heard. Mai turned back to the screen, glad the darkness covered her blush. 

The screen faded to another title. **Kiss Cam #2: Lin and Mai.** Mai felt Naru stiffen under her. She frowned. They hadn't kissed. Why was this on Yasu's kiss cam? The title screen faded showing Lin typing and Mai straightening up the papers that had been strewn around when Monk and Ayako were fighting. Mai looked up startled when Lin was suddenly standing in front of her. She looked tiny next to the Chinese man. 

"Do you need something, Lin-san?" Mai asked. Lin stood looking at her. Mai took a step forward, confusion on her face. 

"Mai, we have to fight it," Lin's voice sounded strained as he took a step closer. He could have reached out and grabbed her. His fists were shaking. 

"It's the ghosts, right?" Mai asked, moving closer to him. Lin nodded. Mai closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Do you want some tea, Lin-san?" Lin nodded and Mai fled the room. 

"Close, but not quite," Yasu yelled. Madoka giggled as Lin glared at her. Naru stared at Mai until she turned to him. He had a look on his face she hadn't seen before. She dropped her eyes from his. She felt his body relax slightly. 

**Kiss Cam #3: Yasu and Ayako.** Ayako and Monk were arguing. Mai covered her face. She remembered this one and didn't want to see it again. Yasu claimed his undying love for Ayako. The arguing stopped immediately. She could hear Yasu kiss Ayako before the miko slapped him and knocked him to the ground. 

"Don't you ever do that again," Ayako screamed at Yasu and left the room with an angry Monk on her heels. Mai uncovered her eyes to see different text on the screen. Yasu cleared his throat and read it aloud. 

"Yasu's Theory: Only those who have romantic feelings for each other are affected by the ghosts. Those who are nothing more than friends can fight off the feelings. Mai and Lin did not kiss. Ayako reacted poorly. So, what does that mean for Kiss Cam 1? Do Monk and Ayako have unrevealed feelings for each other?" The room became silent. No one moved. 

The screen changed again. **Kiss Cam #4: Lin and Madoka.** Madoka walked into base. Naru was ignoring her. Mai had already given Lin his tea and was moving to place Naru's near him. Madoka climbed between Lin and his laptop. Both Mai and Naru looked up as the sound stopped to see them kissing. Madoka was grinding on Lin who was moving his hands over her body. Naru slapped his hand over Mai's eyes and ordered them to leave the room until they could act like professionals. Madoka giggled and Lin grinned as they left quickly. 

"I never want to see that again," Mai's words rang through the silent room before the screen went to the next scene. **Kiss Cam #5: John and Masako.** They were walking down the hall, looking for the ghosts. 

"I think Kazuya has had enough of the ghosts," John said, rubbing the back of his head. 

"He seemed very upset that Lin wasn't at base," Masako agreed. 

"It's probably a good thing. Lin and Mai have been acting odd when they're in the room together. I wondered if they kissed and that upset our boss." Masako shook her head. 

"Mai said they fought it off. I think it more likely that Matsuzaki-san and Takigawa-san going missing for long periods of time is hindering our investigation." John cleared his throat, indicating he had enough of the conversation. 

"I don't think the ghosts mean us harm. They just miss each other." 

"How did you know?" Masako asked, turning toward him. She moved in front of him and stopped. Slowly, her hand moved up to stroke his cheek. 

"Because I miss you very much. I want more than stolen kisses," John's voice trembled a little. He kissed her gently on the lips. 

"I want more as well. The tall man and pink-haired lady have something protecting them." 

"The red head and her boyfriend keep chasing us away." 

"But they won't go near the others because they're afraid of what we did in the hall." 

"We were so close," John kissed Masako passionately. They pulled apart as Monk's voice thundered around them, driving the spirit out. 

**Kiss Cam #6: Naru and Mai.** Mai stiffened. Naru's arm wrapped itself tightly around her. He'd wanted to say something since the case but could find no way to say anything that didn't involve revealing his feelings for her. As they watched Mai brought Naru his tea. He stood up and caught her wrist. Mai looked down at his hand and then up at his face. 

"Lin and I fought it off before," Mai said. Naru nodded as he leaned down and kissed the side of her mouth. He pulled away slightly, looking at her blushing face. 

"Do you want to fight it off Mai? Or would you rather kiss my handsome face?" Mai sighed and wrapped her free hand around Naru's neck, pulling his lips to hers. He twisted her arm behind her, forcing her against him. The continued kissing as Yasu's voice interrupted. 

"I see the next victims of my kiss cam." Naru paused and glared at him. 

"Get out," Naru said. Furniture being scraped on the floor signaled Yasu's exit. "Now where were we?" Naru started kissing her again. 

Mai hid her face in her hands. This was so embarrassing. How could she face the others now? She felt Naru's hand moving under her shirt. His finger slowly made circles on her back. She looked up. He smirked, knowing he was distracting her. The screen was still showing them kissing. 

As the screen went black, Yasu's voice rang through the room, "Five minutes and counting. The only longer kiss was Madoka and Lin." 

The lights came back on and everyone blinked in the sudden illumination. Naru's hand stayed on Mai's back. She glanced around the room. Lin was glaring at Madoka. Ayako and Monk were having a silent battle. John and Masako were holding hands and smiling slightly. 

"Thank you for coming. My only regret is that i didn't get to show Bou-san my love." Yasu looked heartbroken as Monk glared at him. "I'll be sending everyone a copy to their email for their personal viewing pleasure." 

The room remained silent as Lin and Madoka escaped to his office. The irregulars slowly left. Yasu called out to Mai that he was leaving her the clean up. Mai continued to sit on Naru's lap. His hand still made circles on her back. 

"Do you want to know why I slept with you?" Naru asked. Mai nodded. 

"Lin and Madoka were in our room. Monk and Ayako were in the boy's room. John and Masako were watching the base." 

"You mean they were . . ." Naru nodded. Mai's face turned bright pink. 

"So you just slept with me because it was away from the rest having sex?" 

"Idiot. Didn't you notice there were two other beds in the room?" Mai looked confused. 

"Then why did you insist on sleeping with me in my bed?" Naru moved his free hand up behind Mai's head and pulled her down to his own. 

"Because I wanted this," Naru said as he started kissing her again. 


End file.
